The Awkward Self

I read this blog post this morning and it made my life.  This never-PC, bad ass missionary is so refreshing.  She actually tells it like it is and is a little obnoxious, which I soooo appreciate. 

 

I read her often but she encouraged me especially today, because I've been wondering about my own filter.  In the world of Navy wives, you're - ahem, for the most part - taken as you are.  I mean, in a community of young and old wives and mothers who have pretty much seen it all (and may spend days changing dirty diapers), we all realize that we are none to judge. 

 

But lately, oh man!  I've made a few people quite uncomfortable. 

 

Take Exhibit A.  I went to a Pampered Chef party a couple weeks ago.  When I got there, I sat down and started making conversation.  One women mentioned that she took orientation with our hostess, which told me she was new.  So I asked her how she was adjusting to life in Japan.  SHE (remember this) said that she likes it here, but finds the public toilets hard to adjust to (porcelain squatties mostly). 

 

I guess when I'm enabled, things get scary. 

 

In my attempt to encourage her, I made her completely uncomfortable.  I offered the perspective that these toilets are actually really nice compared to the dirt ones in East Africa (insert detailed description here) and that I think the ones in Japan are actually pretty sanitary because you don't have to touch anything ... and I completely killed our conversation. 

 

I made this woman's eyes bulge out a little bit, and I was so discouraged, since WOW I now realize just how filtered I have to be sometimes.  And how I don't trust myself to know when to dial it down.  I wonder if deep friendships can really be fostered if I'm constantly worried about saying the wrong thing.  I also resent the day I start talking about curtain patterns and recipes instead of my unadultered passion for Africa (and hey, maybe their toilets!), that I kind of really like homeless people, and how my husband gave me a sternum bruise from playing Candy Bars (that's for another post).  I guess when it all comes down to it, life goes on, and there are more fish friends in the sea.

 

Part of me is just a little bit awkward and a little bit much.  But I can live with that. 

Fall Showers

When it rains a lot in Minnesota, we get worms.  Well, I recently discovered Japan's counterpart.  We've been experiencing a lot of downpours and flood warnings.  And the result?  Snails.  We actually have to watch our step when we leave our house now. 

 

Check it out!

 

Right on our patio!

From Where He's Standing

Speaking of my last post, John Gossage recently came to Japan and photographed the normalcies.  Now that I've lived here a year, I found a little nostalgia in his work - the tone was dead on.  The trains.  The way the alleys look.  The bikes parked on every corner.  Even the density of people and the flow of foot traffic.  If you don't plan on coming to Japan, take a peek and get a glimpse anyway. 

From Where I'm Standing

 

This is the view from our 3rd level.  We have a big ol' driveway in front that is partly ours, but notice our main mode of transportation.  Heh. 

 

Other Navy families with houses like ours refer to them as 'vertical trailers.'  Though they are three stories, they shoot straight up, and each level is 'semai' - small, not spacious.  Our house is perfect for a young couple; we fit quite nicely.  And the higher you are, the better you can see.  Now, our view isn't the greatest thing, but it's a good look at a typical Japanese residential area.  Lots of haphazard colors and things jutting out to the sky.  Things aren't very pretty or coordinated here.  They're spontaneous and unorganized. 

 

BUT the character of Japan is unmatched.  It's homey and comfortable.  It isn't posh (except Ginza, that is), but it's clean.  It may not be organized and orderly, but it's distinctive.  And it works.  The urban areas of Japan are like giant games of Tetris; every bit of space is filled with a small house, a shop, a restaurant.  Underground, built on top, shoved in right there.  I haven't seen a yard in months.  But what we have in place of a yard is a makeshift patio and great people watching. 

 

Score.